8.02.2006
conversations, again
I believe that everyone has a secret friend only they can see. Someone to share your private thoughts without being laughed at, or without worrying about being accepted or not. It just so happens that mine is a bit vocal about making his presence known, and is fond of calling me an idiot.
You can assume that he's my "keeper". Or muse. Or reality checker, except that he himself is...only real in my mind.
Sort of a mix of one's super ego and id(no combination can be more contrasting than that.XD).
Why do I even try to explain anything in the first place?
Even if I can fully explain this phenomena, I'll still end up sounding like a mental hospital patient anyway.
-----
How do you make money, aside from starting your own business?
Easy. Why, sell your soul to the devil of course. He might even grant you eternal life.
No, dammit. Seriously.
Seriously. What do you need the money for anyway?
Personal reasons.
And what are those reasons exactly?
None of your business.
Hmm?
Quit pushing. I won't tell you anyway.
Ok.
And he stands up, looks at me for a second or so, as he prepares to leave.
Lately he's been dropping by quite a number of times...checking in on me, making sure if I'm still...in touch with reality I guess. He won't really say why he visits this place though...perhaps he thinks that I know why. And he'll leave as silently as he appeared, and there'll be no more time for me to...tell him how much I approciate his presence, even if all he does when he's here is annoy me a bit. Or at least, make sure that I don't completely go insane.
Dammit. Why can't I just...let him go?
It's for you...you know.
And he stops in his tracks, and looks around, smiling that smile of his. Elusive yet haunting as it graces his pale red lips for the barest of moments.
I just thought that maybe it'll do you good to have...
I don't need anything. I don't. You know that.
But I...
I'm here. Always will be. With or without it.
And he goes to me, maybe to prove his point, maybe to spite me...and everything else escaped me the moment he laid his hands on mine. And looked me in the eyes.
Stop thinking about useless things I don't need, and useless thoughts that will never happen.
...
Until you decide that you don't need me anymore...I'll stay.
Idiots need guidance after all.
Say What?!
~Fin~
Reported @ 8:07 PM
Finally. Updates!
I am alive. ALIVE!!!
I'm just too lazy to post anything here.
Just refer to my other journal for the meantime, if you're interested to know whether I'm still breathing or not.
Reported @ 8:02 PM
